Life Is But A Dream
by labyrinth-dreams
Summary: Alice has to decide, to stay or go, now that the Jabberwocky has been defeated. Can love help her decide, and is love enough?
1. Chapter 1

**LIFE IS BUT A DREAM**

Chapter 1: On The Way To Marmoreal

Alice tried to keep her eyes open, even as the gentle sway of the bandersnatch attempted to lull her into a deep sleep. It was amazing that such a terrible and frightening beast could be so tamed, and gentle. At least with her, if no one else.

It did take a little bit of persuasion on her part, for it, or would that be him, to allow her ridding companion to join her upon his back, for the return journey to the kingdom of Marmoreal, where the White Queen's castle resided.

This time, instead of ridding boldly astride the back of the bandersnatch, as she had earlier, as the champion of the White Queen, when she had gone to face the seemingly impossible task of battling the Jabberwocky, she now rode side-saddle, if without the actual saddle.

Side-saddle was the way a girl of good home and upbringing should, according to society, although she was never clear about who in society had made that decision, but she suspected it could be the same person that determined all good girls must wear corsets. But good girls would not ride upon the back of a bandersnatch, nor anything else, with legs dangling over the side, tucked neatly into the warm body of her ridding companion, who was shockingly not her husband, nor any related male member of her family, with her head resting upon said gentlemen's shoulder.

Especially not dressed in silver armor, and a sword sheathed at her waist.

Alice could only imagine the shock upon the face of her mother and sister, embarrassed at the latest odd behavior of the youngest member of the family. Each one would most likely box her ear, and send her to her room to contemplate her actions. They would then worry if she had gone round the bend, and have to retire early to bed, due to the head-ache she had induced.

Dear Aunt Imogene would still be waiting for her prince, completely unaware of what had happened.

Faith and Fiona Chattaway would run and tell everyone they knew, and just as many they did not, as they embellished the story so greatly, that it would be upon a talking dragon she rode, naked, singing an off-key tune.

Although, in Wonderland, she could only imagine, that perhaps that was possible.

Lady Ascot would most likely have a fit of anxiety, collapsing into the arms of her husband, and Lord Ascot, well, he was a bit harder to read, but she would think, he would be glad she would not be joining his family, and poor Hamish, the scandal would most likely upset his delicate digestion so much, it would cause a terrible blockage.

The mere thought of that caused her to wrinkle her nose, and consider it good that she would not be his wife.

But her papa, her very dear papa, should he see her in this state, would laugh and congratulate her on her bold and brave victory. She could almost hear his voice, _that's my brave girl, show the world what you are made of, be fearless and strong, my mad, dear little Alice._

Alice rather thought that he would love Wonderland, and all the creatures that resided within it. She blinked back the tears that came to her eyes.

Shifting her position slightly, the arm that held her tightened a bit, and his bandaged and thimble covered fingers clutched her waist, as she stared over the his shoulder, orange hair brushing her cheek, to look at the army that followed, lead by Queen Mirana. Her army now greater, since the Red Queen's forces had joined her own, after the death of the Jabberwocky.

The Red Queen, Iracebeth, and her dreadful Knave were chained together and banished to the deserts of the Outlands, to be shunned by all. No two deserved each other more than they did.

The bandersnatch leapt over a small stream, causing Alice to slip, and she reached up to grab whatever was available, which just happen to be the strand of colorful thread spools her companion draped across his shoulder and chest. His arm tightened it's grip even more, keeping her steady and in place.

"Terribly sorry, Hatter." She said, looking into his bright green eyes, and letting go of the thread spools.

"Sorry, terrible, not so terribly terrible, and I'd much rather you did, instead of falling. Falling would most definitely be terribly terrible, worse than sorry." He answered, as only he could, with a wide grin.

Alice smiled, glad to see that he seemed a bit more light-hearted than he had before the battle. Glad to see that at the moment, those unnaturally green eyes seemed clear.

Although no expert of green eyes, she could not imagine that anyone in her world, or Wonderland, had eyes like the Hatter. His eyes changed, depending on his mood, from bright green to a terrible, almost glowing yellow, when his anger was aroused. Even his face seemed to darken, becoming something terrifying to behold.

Luckily, he could be brought back from that darkness, with a touch or word, at least if it were she or Mallymkum.

Mally, who currently rode upon the Hatter's top hat, keeping watch for any danger. Such a brave and fierce little door mouse, willing to fight for her friend and companion. She and Mally were still far from friends themselves, but they both considered Hatter their friend, and had gained respect for the each other.

Perhaps friendship would come in time.

Time, what a curious thing it was, running differently here than in her world. A world she had to make a decision regarding; there or here? For safely in her gauntlet, was a small vial, filled with the glowing lavender blood of the Jabberwocky.

The White Queen had given it to her, shortly after the Jabberwocky's death, and Alice had every intention of drinking it. As she had told Hatter, she had many questions that needed answers, but something in his face, and the way he told her, that she could stay, questioned what had seemed absolute.

Which is how she came to be in her current position, with the Jabberwocky blood, that with just the tiniest of sips, would return her to the world she was born to, and lived.

A world that was familiar to her; where she would be expected to behave according to society's demands, suppressing her nature and maybe even crushing it in time, as she bent to it will. Where, maybe her adventures in Wonderland, or as she now knew it to be called, Underland, would become foggy and faint and possibly forgotten, despite her saying she would not forget.

But did she want to return to that world, was now her current and predominant unanswered question, and that question ran round and round in her head. The White Queen said it would be her decision, to go or to stay, but Hatter, well, he seemed to want her to stay.

But would she, and could she?

It was too much to think of, and all the rush from the fear, and exhilaration, was gone from her, leaving her drained and tired, and sore. Fighting a Jabberwocky had been no easy task. So, she decided, that now was not the time to think, but to sleep.

Difficult questions could wait until later.

Just before her eyes closed, her last waking sight was the Hatter looking down at her, a most unusual and strange look upon his pale face, as he whispered, "Alice, my dear girl."

* * *

_**To be continued…**_

* * *

The novels Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass by Lewis Carrol are considered public domain, but since this story is inspired by Tim Burton's interpretation on the original characters, I sadly cannot lay claim to his vision, although they are the inspirations for my story.

Tim Burton owns his vision/version of the characters, I am just borrowing. He only gave Disney the privilege of presenting his creation.

This is of course, only a product of fan love, and I have used several sources for my story, the movie, the novel based on the movie, and the Visual Guide to the movie (thanks to my friend, who gave them to me as a belated birthday gift…I guess waiting 5 months was worth it…that, and my whining that you didn't care!, lol!...not the movie, not yet, just the books), and one of the discarded early drafts of the movie that had more of a romance to it, but was discarded (off with that person's head!), that was posted online.

Hope you enjoyed my beginnings of a story.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Here Or There?

Alice was not sure how long she slept, but she knew some time had passed. She had just been so very tired; having not really slept in such a long while.

While she slept, she could hear voices fussing at her, and occasionally someone would touch her cheek or hold her hand. A quiet voice would cajole her to wake, and occasionally grow harsh, commanding her, only to be shushed by the voice of another.

It must surely be her mother and sister, fusing over her for some reason. She must have overslept for some important date; wasn't she suppose to attend a summer party at Lord and Lady's Ascot's home? She really would prefer to stay home.

Once again a gentle hand clasped hers, "Mother?"

A definite male voice laughed and brushing a hand across her face, answered, "No, my dear."

"Papa, is that you?" Her voice a bit confused, wasn't papa dead? She forced herself to wake, "I had that strange, mad dream again."

"Mad you say," said Hatter, as her eyes opened.

"I'm still here?" She said, a bit disoriented, taking in his pale face, with it's unusual coloring, and his wild orange hair. His beloved top-hat upon his head.

Alice looked around, a bit dazed and unsure, and saw Mally glaring at her from where she sat on the bed's headboard post. "Finally awake, you silly nit?", said the very crossed door mouse, tail flicking and one tiny hand resting on her hat pin sword, a gift from Hatter.

She appeared ready to use it, and Alice feared she was the intended target.

"Now Mally, my sweet, be mice," Hatter giggled, wagging a thimble covered finger at his cohort in gentle rebuke, "mouse…Oh, dear, I mean nice."

He shook his head, as if to clear it, shoulders shaking in silent laughter. This only elicited a tiny grunt from her, and caused her tail to flick a little more determinedly. Mally muttered something Alice could not make out which was probably for the best.

Returning his attention to her, "Now Alice, such a fright you gave all of us. Sleeping so long. A whole day, at that! Very rude to make all of us wait for you again, still so very naughty."

"That long?" She looked over and noticed that it appeared to be early afternoon. "I've been asleep since yesterday?"

He nodded, and his mood, ever changing, quickly became solemn, "I thought you might never wake." His green eyes dimming a bit.

"I thought I had returned home, and maybe this truly had been nothing more than a strange dream, that I had finally accepted, convinced myself was real." She explained, pushing herself into a sitting position, "I'm very glad it is real; that you are real."

Hatter's eyes and smile grew so big, she thought he could rival Cheshire. She couldn't help herself and returned the it with her own, which she swore caused him to blush, his pale cheeks turning a rosy shade.

While she enjoyed the moment with Hatter, she did noticed that she was now dressed once again in bed clothes similar to those she had worn the night before Frabjous day. Indeed, she was in the same bed chamber; the one she could not sleep a wink in, with the same magnificent balcony. The balcony that she had told Hatter, the he was nothing more than something she made up, a figment of her imagination.

Alice knew that she had hurt him with those words, although he had said nothing. Hatter was incapable of hiding his emotions. He quite literally wore his feelings openly, for all the world to see. She could still see how his face fell, at her saying she would miss him, when she woke up.

Regaining his composure, Hatter returned to their conversation, "Home is relative, or relatively home, isn't it suppose to be where your heart is, home, heart and hearth, but never mind that, where else would you be, you have not drank of the Jabberwocky blood."

She thought he was going to continue, caught up in his words, and unable to stop, as he had done so in the past, when he reached with one of his pale hands into a deep pocket of his coat, and pulled out the small vial of blood, "One of the maids found it, as they undressed you, and gave it to me for safe keeping."

"It's improper to mention any young lady's undressing, especially to said young lady." But there was no heat in her words, and she had a smile on her face. Alice heard the tone of his voice, and the fact that he seemed so serious, and wanted him to be her cheerful, mad Hatter again.

But her comment only seemed to cause a look of confusion on Hatter's face, his eyes nearly crossing, as he tried to determine how he should respond. Taking her far too seriously.

"I was only teasing you, poorly it seems, don't concern yourself with it." She touched his hand.

It seemed to relieve him, and for a moment she had her cheerful Hatter back, when he gave her a quick grin and took a deep breath. But it did not last long. He sat down next to her on the bed, holding the vial between finger and thumb. His face now becoming blank, as if he made an effort not to show anything, but his eyes, those expressive green eyes could not lie, and the sadness was visible, "It is your choice, no matter what I should like."

He took her hand, and placed the vial in her open palm, curling her fingers around it, as his own covered hers. "You must choose your own path."

She could feel the press of his bandages and thimbles; and even the base of the pin-cushion ring he always wore, which currently had several colored pins sticking out of it.

"Why would she want to stay." Mally said, jumping down from the post, and landing on the soft pillow below. Still glaring, only up at her now, instead of down. "She owes us no debt or favor, and she probably has someone waiting for her back in the Otherworld."

"It is true I have a family, though small in size. A mother, sister and aunt." Alice wondered aloud, "I'm sure they are missing me, and I miss them too."

Mally crossed her arms and jutted out her chin, feeling that Alice had made the point for her, looking directly at Hatter, "See, she wants to go home."

Hatter merely sighed, looking down, so Alice could not see his expression, but his hands tightened around hers, almost to the point of pain. Finally looking up, he let go of her hand, and stood up, saying in a overly bright voice, his mood seemingly cheerful, entirely too cheerful; "Well, come along Mally, we must be off to prepare for our return to Witzend, and it is a fair distance to travel."

He bent down, and gently brushed a kiss upon her forehead, lingering a moment or two, before saying "Fairfarren, Alice. I think I will miss you more than I would ever imagine I could." He bent to her ear, and quietly whispered against it, with the faintest Scottish accent, "Ceisd mo chridhe."

Before she could ask what it meant, he walked out of the room, leaving Mally behind, lost in his own thoughts. The door mouse watched him go, mouth agape, before turning quickly around, to look at her.

"Klotchyn, you silly girl, do you even understand what he's told you?" Mally pointed a finger at her, "Maybe Tarrant can't say all the fanciful, polished words you're probably use to, but what he didn't say, said more!"

"I don't understand. What do you mean, what did he not say." Alice asked, concerned, especially with how Mally stormed back and forth on the pillow.

"He waited for you, for so long, that time itself was offended." She threw her hands in the air, as if giving up all hope, "Time stopped, as he waited and waited, and he was willing to get his head chopped off too, and for what, a stupid, strange girl from the Upperworld who didn't think we were real!"

Mally leaped from the bed, and took the same path as the Hatter, muttering, "Why her, what's so special about her."

The vial of Jabberwocky blood, fell to her lap, as she dug her fists into her eyes, trying to stop the tears that she knew were coming. But a few still managed to fall, running down her cheeks, to be wiped furiously away.

"What is this, love?" purred a voice she heard and recognized, before the glowing turquoise eyes and wide pointy grin of Cheshire appeared in front of her.

Looking up at the dark grey, floating head, with turquoise stripes, "Oh, Cheshire, I don't know what to do, and I think I've made a fine mess of things." She wiped her cheeks, when a curious thought entered her mind, "Just how long have you been here and how much did you hear?"

He did not answer her question, instead Cheshire's body appeared in a swirl, as he floated down to the bed and curled himself into a very cat like ball, "Oh, I suspect the girl who slew the Jabberwocky will sort it all out, before it's too late. You seem to be clever, no matter what Absolem might say."

The last time she had seen the hookah smoking blue caterpillar, he had wrapped himself in cocoon. His current life ending, with a new one to begin. She wondered about that new life.

Twisting the blanket with her fingers, asked, "But what did Mally mean?" She knew that Cheshire had probably listened to the entire conversations, even if he would never admit it.

Cheshire rose and continued to rise, floating towards her, "Now you are being purposely obtuse." His tail began to twirl, then his body, but his head remained still. "But I understand, to acknowledge the truth, would only make what is already a difficult decision, even more so. You must listen to yourself, to know your answer."

"But I still don't…", but she did not finish what she was about to say, as Cheshire interrupted.

"Oh, and Alice, the potency of the Jabberwocky blood cannot and will not last forever, your time is limited. You must choose before time makes the choice for you."

With those last words, he swirled, and was gone. Cats whether in this world or hers, truly were mysterious and rather confounding creatures. She suspected cats, particularly this one, were just naturally infuriating beasts.

But she really did not need to finish what she had intended to say, because she did indeed understand what Hatter did not have to say. She had intended to say otherwise, to claim ignorance, and therefore convince herself it was so, and through the convincing, make herself believe. She hoped it would make her choice much easier.

Her decision to go home, where she thought she was suppose to be. But she could not lie to herself anymore.

Tarrant Hightopp, better know as the Hatter, but most often referred to as the Mad Hatter, loved her. It was not the type of love she heard of in fairy tales, or read of in the gothic novels or in any poems, nor anything she had imagined for herself.

His love was strange, mad, and perhaps a tad frightening. But, because she knew of it, she could not just turn her back on him, and say good-bye. The idea of leaving him behind, seemed to cause her as much pain as the idea of not seeing her family.

Love her he did. Enough to offend time on her behalf. Enough to face execution at the hands of the Red Queen for her. Enough to ask her to stay.

But did she love him? He had become a friend, yes; a companion, truly; and very definitely her protector and champion. He had believed in her absolutely, when no one else did, including herself.

Love was much stronger, bigger, and far more frightening than a Jabberwocky. How much more muchier would she need to be?

Alice flipped onto her stomach, and much like she had done as a child when unsure about things, covered her head with the blanket, shrouding herself in darkness and burying her face in her pillow.

Here or there? Underland or her world? Love or not?

She knew she would have to give up one, because once her decision was made, it would be irreversible.

* * *

**To Be Continued**

* * *

F.Y.I:

Sorry it took so long to get this up. I kept rewriting it several times, before I had to force myself to stop.

Klotchyn: "Heads up!" or "Pay attention", as defined by the Alice in Wonderland visual guide…yes, it has a glossary of Underland words, with definitions. In this case, Mally was saying, "Pay attention".

Ceisd mo chridhe is a Scottish/Irish endearment, basically means "My heart will always belong to you". I just thought it would be nice to have Hatter/Tarrant say it, since he is of Underland's version of Scottish.

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and I thank all who have read my story, whether you reviewed or not! Hugs to you all.

Fairfarren, until the next chapter.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: Rediscovering Muchness

Alice sat cross legged in the center of her bed, still holding the vial of Jabberwocky blood in the palm of her hand, for what seemed like forever, but in truth had only been a few hours. The lavender blood noticeably glowed, even in the light of the sun.

While she sat, Alice often cast glances at the door, hoping that Hatter would return, and be his cheerful self. But he did not, so Alice sat and pondered the words of Hatter, Mallymkun and Cheshire, since they had left her to her solitude. Left her to think.

Well, if indeed Cheshire had left. Cheshire being a cat, and cats being rather sneaky by nature, could very well still be in the room with her. Watching and waiting, with the patience that only his species could possess.

It also helped that he had a talent for invisibility.

A shiver went through her body, and she instinctively rubbed her arms, and cast a suspicious look about the room, knowing that, even if he was here, she would not be able to tell.

"You're being utterly ridiculous, Alice." She said out loud to no one, but herself.

She heard her voice echo through out her large empty room, and she realized how alone she was; not just for the moment, but on the path that her life was currently traveling.

Oh, she had her friends, some closer than others, and her family, who did love her dearly, as she did them, but she still felt so alone. She was an odd duckling, amongst swans, one that thought of impossible things, like flying, and traveling to China, when girls of her age and station should be thinking of marriage and beginning a family of their own.

Not that she was opposed to marriage or beginning a family. She wanted one, but had not found he who could be her soul mate; who would see the word and it's possibilities as she did.

At least, when her papa had been alive, she'd had a kindred spirit; one that thought just like her, and encouraged her to believe in her dreams, for he had such impossible dreams too. After his death, her mama and sister had tried their best to understand her, but did not have the same imagination, when it came to the fanciful and fantastic thoughts in her head.

Not that mama or Margaret were without imagination, but they were both more grounded in sensible reality, and tried to teach her to be grounded too. Not that it worked. They would sigh and become a touch exasperated with her, and leave her to her dreams.

Margaret would tease her as a child, saying she was some fey babe, that had been switched with her real sister. Sometimes she thought she was, and sometimes she wished it to be so. She would tell Margaret her wish, and Margaret would then hug her and call her silly; and that she had only been teasing.

But now she was alone, without a kindred spirit to call her own. Mother had father, Margaret had Lowell, although she suspected that was one sided, and entirely on the side of Margaret, but even Lord and Lady Ascot seemed to be perfectly suited for each other.

The sun, now high in the sky, warmed the room, and Alice decided to finally leave the safe haven of her bed. Her legs tingled from being crossed for so long, and she shook them to bring feeling back to both, before placing the glowing lavender vial on her night table, slipping on her robe, and walking out onto the balcony.

She took in the beautiful view of Mamoreal, and knew how she would miss it, if she returned home; miss all the new and wonderful friends she had made here, especially Hatter, if she returned to where she belonged.

If? Didn't she mean when? Wasn't that where she was suppose to be?

But her inner voice argued with her, saying she was a fool, and that she was home and she was most definitely not alone, and more importantly, she did have a kindred spirit, and that she needed to wake up and follow the new path, if she was brave enough.

That path was laid before her and it only required her to take the first step.

"Hatter." She whispered quietly, and a terribly wonderful reality came to her. One that took the air from her lungs, and made her heart beat so strongly, that she was certain it would burst from her chest.

Alice took deep breaths, and rubbed a hand over her pounding chest, where her beating heart shouted out a truth she had deliberately deafened herself to hearing. It did not seem possible, could not be possible, given that she had only been here just a few days.

She loved a half mad man, a gloriously mad hatter, last of the Hightopp clan; her dearest Hatter, her dearest Tarrant.

Feeling faint, Alice sat on the sun warmed marble floor of the balcony, in a most unbecoming way, her robe tangled in her legs, and hugged herself.

She loved Tarrant Hightopp, but could not understand how or when it happened.

According to all the stories and poems she had read, love would happen at first sight, as if one had been struck by lightening. That she would know immediately that he was the one. Know they would have their happily ever after as soon as their eyes met. How naive she was in believing those poets and authors knew of what they wrote.

Those childhood fairy tales were wrong.

For her, real love had been a small flame that she had not know had existed, that had slowly grown in strength, while remaining quiet until it knew she was ready to hears it's truth. A glorious and brilliant truth, that she now opened herself to.

This love had not been something that had come to be in the few days she had been here, but something that had slowly built from her first visit, so long ago. The flame took spark, first as the love of a child, innocent and pure. But as she grew older, matured, so did it, and in the process changing into the love of a woman, even if she had thought the man of her dreams had been, well, nothing but a dream.

Almost as if this love had been a part of her destiny, as much as slaying the Jabberwocky, and she wondered if this was part of the Oraculum, which was now safely back in the hands of the White Queen.

But did she had the courage, the muchness, to grasp that destiny and claim it as her own? Did she dare?

There were things that were without a doubt, of utmost importance to her, that required her attention in her world.

Or did they?

She had always had the dream of carrying out her father's vision, opening outposts in exotic China, seeing the world and changing it. But if she stayed here, than she would have to let that dream go, or let someone else live it, in her place.

Could she do it, and let go of all that had seemed so very important to her, before she followed a white rabbit down a hole? Or could she turn her back on the one real chance she had at love; a chance at knowing and experiencing what her parents had with each other. A soul mate. Such a rare and precious thing, to have that other half of oneself, something that she suspected she would never find it in her world.

Could she give it up? Well, that would depend on Hatter.

She needed to speak to him immediately. They needed to have a real conversation, with questions that would require real answers, before she decided which path she would choose. The path she now hoped to follow.

Of course that would mean finding someone to finish her father's dream, amongst other things. It would also mean somehow finding a way to send a message to her world, if that was even possible.

If it was not possible to send that message, could she just let her old dream go? Let it die?

Yes, she could let it go, although it would break her heart, and she would always wonder; what if. But Alice hoped that it would not come to pass.

Rushing back into her room, she went to the closet, and quickly changed into a plain, serviceable light green dress, and ran a brush quickly through her hair.

Just as she opened the door to leave her room, she nearly tripped over the white rabbit that lead her to Underland.

She had to throw out a hand to catch herself on the door frame, and to keep herself from falling, and most likely crushing McTwisp, who was covering his head with his paws, and had his eyes tightly closed.

"Forgive me, McTwisp." She said after a moment, "I wasn't paying attention, and didn't see you there."

Slowly lowering his paws, and opening his eyes, one at a time, he seemed to gather himself together, "No harm done. Thankfully." He looked about the room, "I was trying to find Cheshire. He seems to have disappeared."

Alice cringed at the pun, even as McTwisp laughed at his cleverness.

"Perhaps you can help me, I need to speak to Hatter." She said, kneeling down to better look him in the eyes.

"Hatter you say?", He had a quizzical look on his face, and took a hop back, "Well, um, he is gone. He departed for Witzend earlier today. Indeed, he seemed distracted, well, more so than usual for him, I might say."

"Gone!" and she knew she said it louder than she intended, based of the startled look on McTwisp's face.

"Well, yes. He almost left Mallymkum and Thackery behind. Very, very distracted. It was almost like he was desperate to get away, or a very important date he had to attend to." He glanced about, as if looking for a way to escape her, and her odd behavior.

"But," Alice said, standing up and trying to keep herself under control, "but I need to speak to him."

He couldn't be gone, Alice thought, not now, when she needed to speak to him desperately. Was it too late?

McTwisp took several more backward hops, and looked up at her, "Well, I would suggest speaking to her Majesty. I'm sure she can help you."

"Yes, yes, please lead the way."

Alice couldn't help but muse to herself, even in her state of worry, that once again she was following the white rabbit. She only hoped that this one wouldn't lead to another fall, and oddly enough she could swear, that she heard Cheshire laughing, as the door closed behind her and McTwisp.

* * *

**To Be Continued**

* * *

F.Y.I:

Sorry it took so long to get this up. I rewrote this chapter so many times, that it no longer resembles the original version, lol! Still not sure if I like it, and maybe at some point I'll edit it, but not now.

I, also, decided how I wanted this to end, so I had to write (type) down what was in my head, while the iron was hot, and before my random amnesia set in. If I don't get it down, I will forget!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter, even if Hatter wasn't in it. He might not be in the next chapter or two, other than in Alice's heart and mind.

More to come, and with luck, quicker than this one.

Fairfarren all!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: A Queen's Advice

It did not take long for McTwisp to lead her directly to the White Queen's personal apartments; as they both now stood before the ornate double doors, waiting to be allowed entrance.

Looking down at McTwisp, she asked, "Should I knock?"

"Oh, no," he responded, "she will know that we are here."

Alice watched him straighten his white vest, with small silver flowers embroidered upon it, and use his paws to smooth his fur, so that not a strand would be out of place. She wondered if she should have dressed more appropriately, than the simple dress she wore, but then brush that thought aside.

Queen or not, Alice was most decidedly on a mission, and could not take the time to bother with what she should wear before royalty. Besides, she did not believe the White Queen would mind, considering what she had already worn before her; a dress made from the curtains of the Red Queen's castle, night clothes and armor. This simple dress was actually much more appropriate and a vast improvement.

So far, in the few minutes they stood waiting, neither of the double doors had opened, and Alice, impatient, raised her hand to knock. But before her knuckles met the heavy gilded wood, one of the doors quietly opened, revealing the White Queen herself.

"Come, come, my dear." She said, motioning her to enter, and stepping back to give her room to do so.

In truth, the White Queen did not seem to step back, so much as to glide upon the air. Even her hands seemed to be alive, always moving, with fingers dancing in the air. A gracefulness that Alice could never achieve, and did not envy. Although it would impress her mother very much.

As Alice stepped into the Queen's receiving room, she heard her say to McTwisp, "I believe this is a talk of a personal nature, so if you do not mind, I cannot invite you in."

"Of course, Majesty, and I do not mind at all" She heard him reply, and as she turned towards them, saw the Queen bend down, and kiss him between his long white ears. She would swear that McTwisp blushed, which once upon a time, she might have thought was odd, seeing a rabbit blush, but no more.

"Thank you so much." She answered, and did not close the door, until McTwisp had turned and hoped away.

Turning to her, the White Queen motioned for her to take a seat on the sofa, and as she did so, Alice looked about the room and noticed the personal touches that made the room her private retreat from the rest of the castle and her courtiers.

Knick knacks, books, plants, and even a painting easel, marked the room as hers. But like the rest of the castle, she favored white, with hints of pastels.

"Is he still looking for Cheshire?" Alice asked, as she sank into the very soft cushioning of the sofa.

Smiling, Queen Mirana took a seat on the other side of the sofa, "Yes he is," and dropping her voice to an almost a conspiratorial whisper, "cats, you see, are very confounding creatures, and I daresay, Cheshire does like to play his games, especially with poor McTwisp."

Alice could not agree more, and nodded her agreement, when the Queen asked, "Would you like some tea?"

"Tea?", she whispered to herself, and her stomach knotted because it reminded her of Hatter, and she did not know how to begin this conversation with a Queen, so she decided to gather her muchness and just begin at the beginning; which was only the proper place to begin.

"No, your Majesty, but thank you.", she began, "Tea is of course very important, you see, not the tea itself, but it reminds me of the man who drinks it, that person being, of course, Hatter, or actually, that would be Tarrant Hightopp, and I need to speak to him most desperately, you see!"

Alice could not seem to stop speaking, now that she had begun, and all her thoughts, concerns and feelings came pouring out, as if a dam had broken and a river set free. She knew she was rambling and could see the Queen's eyes grow wider and wider, and even her dancing fingers stilled, as her face grew serious.

Once she was done saying all that needed to be said, and some that didn't, Alice took several deep breaths, and apologized, "I'm so sorry, your Majesty."

The Queen reached out and grasped one of Alice's in both of hers. "Now, now, no apologies, my dear." Releasing her hand, she seemed to pull a lacy handkerchief from the very air, "Here Alice, wipe your tears, for tears do not accomplish anything."

Alice who did not realize she had begun to cry, as her words tumbled from her mouth, gladly accepted it, and wiped her wet eyes; with a tearful laugh, made a comparison, "Now you sound like Absolem."

The remark made the Queen laugh, "Well, you were not the only one he has used his biting charm upon. Did he call you stupid too?"

Alice nodded her head, and laughed a little brighter, "Yes, several times."

Shoulders shaking in silent laughter, the Queen rose, and glided over to stare out a large window, which took almost the entire space of one of the room's walls. Alice could feel the immediate change in the Queen's mood, a seriousness that seemed to come over her.

Alice was quiet too, as she watched her. The Queen seemed to be looking upon her kingdom, very still and quiet, before she turned her attention back upon Alice.

"Alice," her fingers dancing again, but slowly, "I shall never lie to you, and so I shall be perfectly honest, in what I will say." Gliding over, she looked down at the still sitting Alice, "I would very much like you to stay in Underland. My sister is ruler no more, but she still has her supporters, that would like to see her once again upon the throne, and my sister is clever, never doubt that, and is most likely already plotting how she might return to power. So, to have my champion at my side, Underland's hero and defender, would be very important to me, and a deterrent to my foes."

She gracefully knelt on the floor, her long white skirt billowing about her, "I shall not force you to stay, that is against my vows, and I should not do so, even if it wasn't." She took Alice's hands again, "Search your heart, and be very, very sure in the decision you make. Tarrant has been through so much, and has lost more than anyone else, and deserves happiness, so should you decide to stay, make absolutely certain that is exactly what you want. I should not like to see he, who has been my greatest supporter, hurt any more than he already has been, and that if you choose to stay, hope you will bring a measure of peace to him."

Alice squeezed the Queen's hand, "I know, and I would not intentionally hurt him, but before I can make my decision, I must speak to him first."

"Keep in mind too, we are not like you Alice. Our ways are different, our very being, and perhaps you would consider that odd, but should you stay, you will change."

Alice had suspected, no, known that they were not human, not in the way she considered it, magical and fantastical beings, and sometimes wondered if they were the ones that inspired the myths and legends she so loved hearing of, as she grew up. But she had accepted that fact, but the rest of the Queen's words did startle her, and she abruptly stood up, "What do you mean change? I very much like myself as I am. I do not want to change and become something or someone I'm not!"

Rising, the White Queen tried to calm her, "You will not become someone else, and you will most certainly remain yourself, never think otherwise, but you will.." and the Queen paused, and Alice thought she was trying to choose the right words, "become more like us, in terms of life. I'm sure you've realized by now, time is different here, than in your world, and should you stay, you will change according to how time runs in Underland."

"Immortal?", and Alice felt odd at the thought, to know she could outlive her family and friends, even though she might never see them again.

The Queen smiled, "Almost, but not quite, we can and do die, but you will live much, much longer than you can imagine. To us in Underland, it is nothing, it is how it is and has always been, but for someone from Upperland, where life is shorter, and time is more fickle, I would assume it can be a bit disturbing."

Alice stepped away, and walked to the window, and looked out. To know that at some point her mother, sister and even her aunt would one day be gone, be dust, while she continued to live, made her feel lightheaded. Alice did not hear the Queen approach her from behind, until she heard her speak, "Does that bother you?"

Continuing to look out upon Mamoreal, "Yes, no, I don't know, but it does not matter. I think mama and Margaret would be happy for me, if this is what will make me happy."

"Excellent, and regarding you family in Upperland. I believe I can help with that problem."

She spun around, and startled the Queen, "Really!"

"I believe that McTwisp can help, with a little assistance from me. Rabbits are diggers and creators of holes, and with a little help from the right potion, can dig temporary holes to your world."

"So that is how he was able leave Underland."

Taking her hand, the Queen led her back to the sofa, both taking their seats again, "Yes, it is, but it is very trying on him, and if done too many times, can do harm. I feared for him, when I had him searching for you. If he is willing, I can have him deliver a message to your family, but please know, I will only ask him to do it this once."

Before Alice could speak or argue, she continued, "Each hole weakens the barrier between our two worlds, which would be disastrous for both, should it collapse, and I fear I should not allow any more until the current damage done has healed, which will take many years, perhaps a century or two. But for you, I will allow it one more time, and then no more."

Alice felt thankful, and guilty for some strange reason, "Was that because of your search for me?"

Obviously seeing the look upon her face, "Yes, but that was my decision, and mine alone. We needed you. I needed you, and I was willing to take the risks involved with finding you. Had the barrier become too weakened, I would have stopped. Better the rule of my sister, than me bringing about the end of Underland itself. During all of this, however, Tarrant was most determine to keep sending McTwisp, no matter the cost. He was consumed with finding you."

The mention of Hatter caused Alice to blush, and she blurted out, without thinking, "Does he really love me?"

"That my dear, is not my place to answer, and you must speak to him about. Now you must go. I will have the bandersnatch readied for you. Go, and get yourself ready. You haven't much time, before the decision to remain here, or not, is taken from you all together.", the Queen's hands were moving in a shooing motion.

Alice, who had risen and headed towards the same door that she had entered, paused and turned back to the White Queen, "That is similar to what Cheshire said, something about the Jabberwocky blood."

"He is right, the Jabberwocky blood will only be potent for a few more days, and as it weakens, it's pretty glow will dim, before turning to dust and becoming useless. You will be bound to Underland, whether you would like to be or not."

"I should not like to have the decision taken from me." Alice answered.

"Then go, go now, for time is quiet literally of the essence, and Alice, please choose wisely, for the path you choose will affect more than just you, regardless of which world you decided to call home."

Alice opened the door, before turning towards the White Queen, who was still sitting upon the sofa, "I will your Majesty, and thank you for your advice and help."

Without another world she headed directly to her rooms. She had much to think on, and little time to do so; but the words and revelations of the Queen had brought a measure of peace to her. It also helped her draw closer to her final decision.

Now the world she would choose, the place she would call home, would depended entirely on a half mad hatter.

* * *

**To Be Continued**

* * *

I know it is a little late, but I want to give a big thank you, and some Upelkuchen (remember small nibbles only) to my reviewers: KittenCeez, luna andie, CameoRuby, and Inubaki. I also want to thank anyone who has taken the time to read my story!

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and liked how I decided to explain rabbits, holes, and barriers. I really hope it seemed feasible…in a Underland kind of way!

Until next time, Fairfarren all!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 : Journey To Discovery

The swamp was cast in the dim glow of the quarter moon, that shined down from a sky that was pitch black, and if there were stars, Alice could not see them through the thick trees that were covered in vines and moss. The water, which was everywhere, had a silvery appearance, making it gleam like glass, and the air smelled of the wet vegetation and mud.

She grasped the coarse fur of the bandersnatch a bit tighter, as he walked cautiously through the swamps of Gummer Slough, each step a slow muddy progression, as they headed towards Tulgey Woods. From there, they would cross the burned fields of Ipalm, which would finally lead to Witzend, where Thackery lived in his wind-mill home, and where Hatter and Mally were his permanent house guests.

She had learned in her short time in Underland, that the field of Ipalm was actually a part of Witzend, but since the horrific attack on the Hightopp clan, that terrible Horunvendush day, which left it a burned and barren place, it was now considered haunted and cursed.

The people of Underland gave it a very wide berth.

Alice shivered, remembering the faraway and sad look in Hatter's eyes, as he told her how he alone survived the loss of his whole clan, and her heart ached for him.

The bandersnatch growled low in his throat, letting any potential threat know that he was an even bigger one, if challenged. Alice was grateful that he was protective of her, since she was completely ignorant of the various types of creatures that might haunt and hunt in the darkness of Gummer Slough.

She cast a glance about, and thought she saw shadowy movements, but did not have a sense of threat from any of those unseen creatures. She suspected that none were willing to fight a bandersnatch; still she kept her senses sharp, watching for any movement or sound.

Looking about, Alice realized they were almost through the swampland, and would soon cross into Tulgey Woods. She was grateful, since that would mean she was almost half way to her destination; they had been traveling non-stop, since leaving Marmoreal.

After leaving the Queen's apartments, she had returned to her rooms, and changed into a pair of dark trousers and loose fitting shirt. They were designed for her, and to be worn beneath armor. Obviously, the White Queen hoped she would stay, which would explain the filled wardrobe that she found. She completed her outfit with a pair of soft leathery black boots.

She found wearing the masculine clothing to be freeing, and now knew that it was better suited for traveling upon the back of a bandersnatch, then any dress she could have worn.

After dressing, she had tied her hair back with a strip of black velvet, and used another strip to tie around the lid of the vial of Jabberwocky blood, before knotting the ends together and creating a rather lopsided necklace. She placed it around her neck, and tucked it beneath her shirt.

But before placing it about her neck, she inspected the vial, and it did appear that the Jabberwocky blood did not seem to glow as brightly, as it had the day before.

Before leaving her rooms, one of the Queen's many courtiers arrived, to inform her that dinner would soon be arriving, and that her Majesty insisted she eat first, before leaving. Alice at first thought to refuse, but her empty stomach decided to disagree, by growling most fiercely.

Realizing that not eating was foolish, she waited for the food to arrive and ate her fill. While she satisfied her hunger, she noticed that none of the dishes served, contained meat. Another part of the Queen's vow, Alice assumed. Although, now knowing that even the animals were equal citizens of Underland, and that they could speak and understand as well as she did, Alice admitted she would find it hard to ever eat meat again.

By the time she walked out of the main castle entrance, the sun had set, and she found the bandersnatch waiting for her, along with the Queen, McTwisp and Cheshire. All were cast in the light of the torches, that had been lit the moment the sun went down. The Queen was stroking the bandersnatches ear, and seemed to be whispering to it, before noticing her.

The White Queen twirled around, to face her, "Ready?"

Alice approached the small group, and now stood next to the bandersnatch, who seemed to be listening to the conversation, "As much as I can be, your Majesty."

"Well then, that will have to be enough." She replied and stepped aside, as McTwisp pushed a small wooden step ladder next to the bandersnatch, so Alice could mount her ride with ease.

"Thank you McTwisp.", she said, taking the steps quickly, and swinging her leg over the back of the bandersnatch. She then asked, "I'm not sure what direction I'm going, how will I find my way?"

Not allowing the other's to speak, Cheshire, who was floating on his back, grinned and answered, "The quickest way will be to head north through Trotter's Bottom, until you reach Gummer Slough, once you cross it, you'll enter into Tulgey Woods, keep north, and you will enter Ipalm, from there you'll end up in Witzend. He resides with Thackery. You will see his wind-mill, and surely you will remember what it looks like?"

The Queen shushed him, which caused Cheshire to laugh, and spin his body around. Ignoring him, she turned back to Alice, "I have already given directions to the bandersnatch. He will make sure you make it there safely and with all due haste."

Well, Alice thought, now she knew what the Queen had been whispering into the bandersnatch's ear. It also made her realize that, although the bandersnatch did not speak, he definitely understood what others said around and to him.

Turning to the three, but directing it more to the Queen, Alice remarked, "I feel more frightened, than when I rode off to do battle with the Jabberwocky. What if it is too late?"

McTwisp looked from her to the Queen and then Cheshire, and Alice could see the confusion in his eyes. He obviously could sense there was something unspoken being spoken of, and he needed to know, so he uttered, "Um, did I miss something?"

Cheshire laughed some more, and floated down next to him, placing a paw on his shoulder, "I'll explain it all to you later." He then briefly faded in and out, "That is, if you can find me McTwisp."

This time, when Cheshire disappeared, he did not reappear. McTwisp's ears angling back and forth, listened, when they all heard Cheshire's laugh on the air. The white rabbit took off immediately in the direction of the laugh, determined to find out what he did not know, by catching the tricky cat.

Alice watched McTwisp disappear.

After a few moments, the queen touched her knee, drawing her attention, "Alice, remember what we spoke of early.", she stepped back, "By now, they have already arrived at their destination. If you travel with few or no stops, you should reach them by early afternoon."

She merely nodded, not trusting her voice, but the Queen understood, and merely said, "Good journey, and should this be the last time we meet, then it has been my honor to have known you."

Without any a prompt being needed, the bandersnatch took off at a quick pace.

Only once did Alice glance back, for a last look at the White Queen, her friend. Indeed, the White Queen, Cheshire and even McTwisp were her friends, along with the other's she had met, such as the Tweedle brothers.

The landscape passed by quickly and in a blur, and Alice was still impressed that, for such a bulky creature, the bandersnatch was incredibly agile and quick.

He kept the quick pace, even as the moon rose higher and higher in the sky, and the air cooled, causing her to wished she had thought to bring a jacket or wrap, but it was too late now.

Their quick pace finally ended, when they reached Gummer Slough, which they were currently making their path through. But while she had been musing over past events, she now realized they had actually entered Tulgey Woods.

"At last." She said under her breath.

Earlier, when they first entered the swamp, she had decided that once they were through it, she would allow the bandersnatch to rest for a bit. She knew he was pushing himself on her behalf, because she could feel his sides heaving in exertion. But she also needed to stretch and rest too, feeling the strain in her muscles.

Taking a deep breath, Alice appreciated the fresher air of the woods, since the swamp had been muggy and wet, and allowed her eyes to close briefly, before opening them, and saying to the bandersnatch, "Let's rest for an hour or so, we both need it."

Understanding her words, he came to a rest, and lowered himself to his belly, to allow her to slide off.

As her feet touched the ground, her knees gave out, and she ended up most embarrassingly on her backside, legs splayed. Instead of getting up, she decided to just lay down on her back, feeling the grass beneath it. Hearing the sound of water, she looked over to her left side, and saw a small bubbling stream.

Forcing herself to rise, and stretching as she walked, even though her muscles protested with every step, she approached the stream and knelt. Cupping her hands together, Alice helped herself to the cold, clean water. Once her thirst was satisfied, she splashed water on her face and motioned the bandersnatch over, "Please, drink your fill, and then rest a bit. You deserve it, and if you are hungry, you can search for something to eat."

The bandersnatch seemed to nod his head, and began to lap up water.

Alice forced herself to move again, and now sat beneath a near-by tree. Leaning against the trunk, she allowed herself to relax. Looking at the moon, which she could now see, she tried to determine what time it was, and thought it must be well past midnight, so her hopes of reaching Witzend was still on course.

Out of curiosity, she pulled the vial from beneath her shirt, and she believed it was now a little dimmer then it had been, before leaving Marmoreal, or perhaps her tired eyes were playing tricks.

Tucking it back beneath her shirt, she allowed herself to relax, and fought to keep her eyes open, as she watched the bandersnatch begin to lope off into the woods. Alice stopped it, by saying, "When you return, please wake me, if I have fallen asleep."

He nodded, with a toothy grin, and disappeared into the trees. She knew he would not go far, keeping near, to protect her.

Alice contemplated what she should say and do, once she reached Witzend, but decided that she would let what would be, to happen. She only hoped that she could make herself clear and explain what need to be explained.

She also hoped he would listen.

Her mind was muddled with what ifs and should or shouldn't she, and with her body sore and tired, she did the only thing that made sense, at least for this moment.

Eyes growing heavier and heavier, she allowed herself to fall asleep.

* * *

**To Be Continued**

* * *

Sorry this took so long, but spring has sprung and I've been distracted by the out doors, and just been plain busy! LOL! Anyway, I have started the next chapter and Hatter will return at the end of it.

I've also been playing with the idea of doing this story (maybe not quite as long) from his perspective. Yes or no? Perhaps a oneshot? I'll have to see, when I finish this one. Maybe a sequel? Anyway, I've fleshed out the remaining chapters, somewhat, and it is just a matter of editing and reediting.

Hugs and a big thank you to those that have reviewed, and a big thanks to all who have read my story.

Fairfarren all!


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6 : Windmills and Shears

Alice had covered a great distance, since being waken by the bandersnatch some time ago. Although she would not have chosen to be woken by having him lick her face, from chin to forehead, and back again, with his rather large and wet tongue.

She had to wash her face in the cold stream, before they could continue their travel.

They quickly crossed Tulgey Wood as the sun rose, the sky lightened and the air warmed. It was filled with trees that were so tall, she could not see their tops. She could not imagine that anything could grow so tall.

Every so often she had to bat away dragon or horse flies, that were chasing each other. She had to admit, they were beautiful, since they actually looked like horses and dragons, unlike the ones in her world.

Birds also flew about, jumping from one tree limb to another, coming in many sizes and colors, and singing cheerful songs.

Fortunately, not a single jubjub bird could be seen. She briefly saw the one that the Red Queen had commanded, during the battle on Frabjous day, and learned from Mally and Bayard that it had been killed.

Alice took a moment to wonder where in Underland one would find such creatures as jubjub birds, bandersnatches and Jabberwockies. She felt a cold chill at the thought, and hoped she might never visit that particular part of Underland.

One Jabberwocky had been more than enough for her, and Alice could not imagine that there might be more.

She forced the thoughts of Jabberwockies from her mind, and watched the trees, birds and flowers pass her by, as the bandersnatch kept a steady, quick pace. It did not take them long to cross Tulgey Wood, and it did not take long, before they entered the fields of Ipalm.

The difference was dramatic, and immediate. Even the bandersnatch felt it, so much so, he came to an abrupt halt; freezing. Alice could feel his fur bristle beneath her fingers.

The first time she had been here, she had not paid much attention to what was about her, having been more interested in trying to figure out what was going on, and how to wake up from her confusing dream; back when she thought it was all still a dream.

She also had Hatter with her, and she had been very focused on him and his tragic story. Even then, when she thought him only a figment of her imagination, she had felt her heart ache, as he spoke of what had happened to those he loved and called family.

She couldn't imagine what it would feel like to lose her entire family in such a horrific manner.

It would be something that she would never recover from, and because of that, she knew Hatter had not. Hatter was forever scarred because of it. She could see it in his eyes, and hear it in his voice. When he spoke of his clan, she could feel his aloneness, and longing, for what he had lost.

She shook her head, to clear those dark memories.

The rest of her brief time in Ipalm was spent in his pocket, as he ran from the Red Knights that were pursuing the both of them. He kept her safe, and even allowed himself to be captured, in order for her to remain free. He protected her at his own expense.

Now she allowed herself to see Ipalm in all it's terribleness.

The trees were burnt skeletons; twisted and black. The ground was scorched and brittle, and she was sure that she could see the dark, ghostly outlines of those that perished that Horunvendush Day. What had once been homes, were now grotesque death masks.

Not a single sound could be heard, or a sign of life. As if time itself had died, in this field, along with the Hightopp clan.

Looking behind her, she saw the lush green of Tulgey Wood, full of life and sound. Looking forward again, the absolute deathly quietness and destruction of Ipalm laid before her. It was, as if, an invisible barrier or wall separated Ipalm from the life of the lands that surrounded it.

Alice could understand why the people of Underland would avoid it.

The fields seemed cold and oppressive, as if the very terror of the Hightopp clan was permanently embedded into every fiber of it. Alice would swear she could hear their screams, still echoing in the oppressive air.

Bending low to the bandersnatch's ear, she told him, "Let us travel though this field as quickly as we can."

The bandersnatch shook itself, and began to run, as eager as she was to leave this place behind. Alice had to grasp his fur tightly, to hold on.

She knew exactly when they left Ipalm behind, because the heaviness was lifted from her chest and she could breath easier. She had not realized how much it had weighed upon her; it was like almost drowning, and managing to break the water surface, at the last minute.

She was grateful to leave Ipalm behind, and enter Witzend.

Witzend was a mixture forest and field, but unlike the first time she was here, when it was rather misty and somewhat dreary, it was now bright and clear. They traveled over small hills, and crossed wild fields, and once, when they passed a small pond, they briefly stopped to take a drink.

Through it all, Alice kept looking for the March Hare's windmill. She knew it had to be close; she was sure of it.

Finally, she recognized in the distance, the very run down windmill; the home of Thackery, the March Hare. He was the best friend of Tarrant Hightopp, and had also witness the destruction of the Hightopp clan. From the few times she had met the March Hare, she had thought him much more mad than Hatter.

"We're almost there." She quietly said to the bandersnatch, and scratched his ear affectionately.

The sun was now high in the sky, and she knew it must be the afternoon, and as the bandersnatch made his way towards the windmill, Alice tugged on his fur, saying, "Stop, stop here please."

He stopped, and lowered himself to his belly, allowing her to slide off easily. Resting his head on his front paws, he looked at her, waiting.

Alice turned to him, "Wait here."

The bandersnatch made a noise in his throat, and she reached out to rub his nose, "I must do this by myself." She turned away, then turned back to him, "I'll be perfectly fine, and thank you so much, I couldn't have made it in time, without you."

He seemed to smile, and with his tongue licked his own face. Taking that as approval and support, she began to walk towards the windmill. Reaching beneath her shirt, she lifted the vial and looked at it, and saw that it still glowed; somewhat.

As she drew closer, she noticed the three cloth covered tables, that had been part of the longest tea party in Underland history, were still in their same spot, unmoved and unchanged. The chairs of various styles still surrounded the tables, which was covered in chipped, broken and faded china, along with scones, creams, jams and Battenberg in various states of decay.

Apparently no one had thought to clear and clean the tables.

As she walked by the table nearest her, she picked up a dainty rose painted dessert plate, with chipped edges, that sat very close to the edge, to check her reflection. Perhaps it was vain, but she did want to look her best for him.

Her hair was a tangled mess, with bits of leaves, and what appeared to be tiny twigs, twisted in her hair. Her face would have been shiny with perspiration, had it not been for the fine layer of dust and dirt that coated it.

Placing the plate back on the table, she went to wipe her face, when she noticed her hands were not any cleaner, which lead her to look at her clothes, which were wrinkled and filthy. She had not realized how filthy she had become, in her hurry to get here, and could not recall ever being in this state. Her mother and sister would have been appalled.

Well, after they recovered from being appalled at what she was wearing.

Alice noticed a somewhat clean napkin on the table, at least cleaner than the others that were available, and picked it up. She used it to wipe her face and hands the best she could, then attempted to make her hair and clothes a bit more presentable.

Once finished, she did not think it much of an improvement, but it would have to do. Glancing at the bandersnatch, who was resting and watching silently, she threw back her shoulders and gathered her muchness.

"It is now or never, Alice." She encouraged herself, and began to walk.

As she approached the entrance of the windmill, she could hear the distinct voices of Thackery, Mally, and most importantly, Hatter.

But it was the tone of the voices that caused her to pause. Thackery and Mally sounded anxious and worried; Hatter's sounded strange, off, not quite right, and was heavy with his thick Scottish brogue.

Silently pushing the door open, she stepped inside.

The scene before her made her heart stop and froze her in place. None of the inhabitants noticed her, so involved with what was happening amongst themselves.

Before her was the Hatter, who paced agitatedly back and forth, hands clenching and unclenching. His face was terribly dark and his bright vibrant green eyes unfocused, with a terrifying look in them, as his lips curled into a mad grin.

But this was not the madness she knew, and had seen before, this was something much darker and more destructive. This was a madness that, if he was not brought back from the edge, he might fall forever into it.

Mally and Thackery, who had their backs to her, seemed to be pleading with him, begging him to calm himself, but not even their words, especially Mally's, which had always brought him back before, seemed to have any affect upon him.

She watched him pause, and turn round and round, as if he wasn't sure where he was at, he almost seemed confused, when he stopped, and looked directly at her. Alice was sure he saw her, despite his unfocused look, when she heard him say, in that deep, dark Scottish brogue, "Still she haunts me, phantomwise, Alice moving under skies; Never seen by waking eyes."

"Hatter, please!" Mally pleaded, her shoulders shaking, and Alice knew she must be crying.

Thackery, approached him slowly, "Tarrant?"

Hatter closed his eyes and dropped to his knees, "Children yet, the tale to hear, Eager eye and willing ear, lovingly shall nestle near. In a Wonderland they lie, Dreaming as the days go by, Dreaming as the summer dies."

Thackery and Mally fell back as Hatter rose, and whipped his hat from his head and threw it viciously across the room, where it hit a wall and fell to the floor, and then snatched his drape of colorful threads, and ripped it from his body. Spools of thread flew everywhere, creating a colorful chaos.

Mally rushed over to the hat, "Hatter, please, I beg you. It is all you have left of your family."

"Gone, gone." Hatter muttered, pulling at his bright orange hair and, looking at her, dropped to his knees again. "She haunts me, my friends."

She looked into his eyes and saw the desolation in them, a hopelessness that she couldn't fathom.

"Tarrant, you must have know she might not stay." Thackery said to his dear friend. Alice had never heard the March Hare sound so sane. "This isn't her world, laddie."

She saw Hatter's hand move to his coat, and reach beneath, "Perhaps I should have died with the rest of my clan on Horunvendush Day. Then I would not know this pain."

From beneath his coat he pulled a pair of shears, shinny and sharp, with the pointed tips aimed towards himself, and Alice knew at that moment, what he intended to do. Mally and Thackery must have know it too, for like her, they rushed towards him, as his arm rose high.

She screamed, as she saw that arm swing downward, aiming for his own chest, directly and deliberately towards his heart. Her scream caused Mally and Thackery to stop and turn, looking at her with disbelief.

Ignoring both, she leapt towards him, screaming. "Tarrant, no!"

* * *

**To Be Continued**

* * *

The poem the Hatter quotes is from Lewis Carroll's Life Is But A Dream, which is about Alice and Wonderland. I of course, abridged it. If you're interested in reading the full poem, here it is:

A boat, beneath a sunny sky

Lingering onward dreamily

In an evening of July--

Children three that nestle near,

Eager eye and willing ear,

Pleased a simple tale to hear--

Long has paled that sunny sky;

Echoes fade and memories die;

Autumn frosts have slain July.

Still she haunts me, phantomwise,

Alice moving under skies

Never seen by waking eyes.

Children yet, the tale to hear,

Eager eye and willing ear,

Lovingly shall nestle near.

In a Wonderland they lie,

Dreaming as the days go by,

Dreaming as the summers die;

Ever drifting down the stream--

Lingering in the golden gleam--

Life, what is it but a dream?

It is what inspired the title for my story, and I knew I had to work it in! I thought it would be appropriate for the Hatter to quote it. Okay, the fan girl in me would love to have a recording of Johnny Depp, with the brogue, reading the Jaberwocky poem and this one. Gah I'm such a geek! LOL!

I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and my little cliffhanger. Let me know what you think.

Anyway, big hugs and thanks to my reviewers, and anyone that has read it. I really hope you like my work. I promise not to make you wait too long for the next chapter.

So fairfarren all, until next time!


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Tears, Love and Tea

Alice leapt with all her might. Her sore and tired body protesting, even as her heart and head reacted out of pure instinct; the need to protect that which is near and so very dear to her, even if it was from their own self.

The momentum of her leap caused her to hit his body hard; knocking him over, so that they both began to fall to the ground. As he fell backwards, he released the shears, in an instinctive attempt to stop his fall. Unable to, he landed on his back, arms flying outwards. She heard the crack of his head, as it connected with the hard wood floor, and his breath being knocked from his lungs. Their legs became tangled, and she landed heavily upon him, his body breaking her fall.

Alice must have closed her eyes, for it took a moment for her to realize the sensation of falling was gone. Slowly opening them, she found herself chest to chest and face to face, with Hatter.

Her hands were still wrapped tightly around the shears.

Their faces were so close, that she could feel his breath upon her lips, so warm and sweet. His wide eyes were dazed and unfocused, not from his madness this time, and she only hoped his head was not injured.

Alice had never been so close to a man, so close that only their clothing separated them from each other. She could feel the shape of Hatter's body, feel the rapid beat of his heart, and the rise and fall of his chest, as he began to recover is breath.

She could feel his very warmth.

What a scandalous and most unbecoming position she now found herself in. If she had been home, her reputation would be completely ruined, and she would end up like dear dotty Aunt Imogene, confined to the country and kept away as often as possible, from polite society. Even her friends, few that she had, would be lost to her.

Or, she could find herself hastily married, to someone even less desirable than Hamish. Trapped with that stranger for life, and all to just to save her reputation; and that of her family.

But she could never imagine being in such a situation, that it would require her to end up in the position she now found herself in, with anyone at home. But neither could she imagine her heart beating so fast and aching so much, for anyone but him. Definitely not for Hamish, or any of the other young men that she had been introduced to, by her mother or sister.

Shaking her head, she made herself come back to the situation that was at hand, when Alice noticed the tip of the shears was driven deep enough, that it had sliced through his clothes, but could not tell if it had actually cut his flesh.

"Alice," He said in a quiet and faltering voice, eyes still wide, but beginning to refocus. "Is it really you?"

She could not respond to his question, her tongue and voice frozen. Instead she threw the shears viciously aside, not thinking or caring what they hit or where they fell. She saw blood on his clothes and fearing the worst, pulled his coat, neckcloth, and vest apart, then tore open his shirt. Buttons bounced everywhere, clattering as they hit floor and walls.

She searched his chest, her hands sliding over his pale flesh, looking for any kind of injury, but despite the blood that was, even now, smeared across his chest, Alice could not find a wound. Not a single nick or cut.

"Alice, your hands." Hatter tried to grasp her desperately searching hands in his, as they move frantically across his chest, "You're bleeding."

It took several moments for his words to penetrated her brain, and make sense. She stopped, and straightened herself, so her knees were at his sides, and she sat upon his legs. Hatter laid beneath her, very still. Alice lifted her hands, palms up, and saw a thin, straight slash across both, and watched as they bled profusely.

Hatter was unharmed, but Alice could not say the same for herself.

The blood was not his, but hers. It seemed, that in grabbing the shears, her palms had slid down the sharpened edges, and sliced them open. Like any injury, they began to throb and sting, once the injured person realized they existed.

Hatter gently touched her hands, causing her to look at him. The darkness was fading from his face and eyes, and he was becoming more of the Hatter she knew and loved. Reason was taking hold and the fearful madness seeping away.

"I thought you were gone, back to Upperland." She heard him whisper, unsure. "That you weren't real. But you're still here, and not there. Are you really you and, if you are really you, are you really still here?"

Still silent, she felt the fear and terror drain from her, leaving her weak and chilled, a shiver ran through her body, but it was quickly replaced by anger. Alice felt the heat drive away the chill, and the fury making her strong. She rolled herself from his body, and despite her injured hands, rose to her feet, looking down at Hatter.

Anger was a powerful emotion, dark and terrible, and one she had never really felt before, but at the moment it felt wonderful, and made her forget about the throbbing pain of her palms. It made her blind to anything, but the object of her anger.

"How dare you, Tarrant! How dare you try to end your life. You, who had done so much to save Underland, to just throw it all away!" Her voice rose and she did not care, her finger pointed at him accusingly, dripping small droplets of blood. "What you attempted was the most selfish and foolish thing you could do. Yes, foolish. No, it was beyond foolish, it was stupid. Very, very stupid!"

Hatter rose, clothes askew and red stained with her blood. He did not try to straighten them, nor did he say anything. He seemed unsure and shocked by her reaction, his lips pulled into a frown, his eyes cast downward. He looked and acted guilty of the charges she made against him.

"Did you even stop to think how it would affect your friends, and those that love you?" Her finger poked his exposed chest, and still he continued with his silence. So quiet, he was, but she notice how he stilled when she said the word love. A stillness that takes hold, when one is afraid of what will happen, or what would be said.

But she wanted him to react, not be still or quiet. To explain; to say or do anything. His silence only angered her more.

From the corner of her eye, she saw Thackery and Mallymkun, both with their mouths open, and stunned looks upon their faces. But she did not care that there was an audience to her anger. Even they must realize her anger was most definitely justified.

"That was pure cowardice, and I never once thought you were a coward!" Without thought, acting on pure instinct, she slapped him, hard, across his right cheek. The loud sound of her hand against his cheek, filled the room. His head turned, with the force of it, and even though it sent a knife-like pain from her palm and up her arm, she did not care. She breathed through her nose, and let the pain roll through her body.

Because he was so pale, her hand left a vivid red mark, and a thick smear of her blood, across his cheek.

Still he did not move, but continued to look at her with sad and remorseful eyes.

The rage drained from her, leaving her weak and feeling cold again. Her body began to shake, and tears began to spring from her eyes. Regret filled her. This was not like her; she was not an angry or violent person.

Staring at her hands and feeling ashamed, she bit her lips, trying unsuccessfully to hold back tears, "I'm sorry, I had no right, but why, please tell me why?"

Finally he move, wrapping his arms about her. Alice was, at first, stiff in his arms, determined not to be cajoled. But it did not last long, so happy she was to be in his arms. She buried her face in his neck and cried, and cried and cried, until she did not think she could cry anymore, and not a single tear could be left, but still she cried. Her eyes felt sore and swollen, and her nose stuffy. Hatter rubbed her back, and made soothing noises, trying to calm her.

"Alice, it's alright. I deserved it, and you are allowed to be angry." He held her tighter. "Please Alice, don't cry. If you cry anymore, you'll dry yourself up and the wind will blow you away, and then I'll have lost you again."

He brushed his lips across her forehead, and then bent, and picked her up in his arms, carrying her over to a worn sofa. He tried to settle her upon it, but she would not let go of his neck. "I must tend you hands, you have to let me go."

"I don't want to let you go." She said. "What if you do something stupid again?"

"Not with you here my dear, now that I know you're real, and really here.", he gently kissed her cheek, feather light, "Please Alice, let me take care of your hands."

She allowed her arms to slide free, and watched Hatter walk to a table, held up by a stack of books, since two of it's four legs were missing. Upon it sat a chipped pitcher and bowl. He picked up the pitcher, tipped it, and poured water into the bowl, before returning to her. Kneeling down in front of her, he took a yellow scarf from his pocket, and dipped it into the bowl.

He squeezed the excess water out, "I'm going to care for you hands." He took one hand, then the other, gently cleaning each palm. Alice expected it to hurt, but, either because he was so gentle, or because the pain had given way to numbness, she felt nothing. It was most probably a combination of both.

After cleaning her palms, he declared, "There is no need for stitches.", and Alice was pleased to hear that bit of information.

He then pulled a blue scarf from his pocket, and used it to bandaged one hand, tying it neatly with a bow on top. He repeated his bandaging , on her other hand, only this time with a green scarf.

Obviously he had a talent for bandaging, and the caring of hand injuries. But given the many scars on his own hands, and the thick bandage that was still currently wrapped around his thumb, it did not surprise her. Hat makers worked with their hands; cutting, sewing, trimming, pinning and such, it was only expected their hands would suffer various injuries, and that they would have to learn how to care for themselves.

While he tended her, he kept his head down, never looking at her. He seemed embarrassed and ashamed.

Touching his stained, bruised cheeks, she lifted it with her now colorfully bandaged hand, "Why, please Tarrant, tell me why."

Her brown eyes pleaded with his bright green ones, begging for answers. His green eyes begged her for understanding.

"Truth, then, Alice." He pushed a lock of her blonde hair behind her ear. "You see, or perhaps you do not, since one cannot see spoken words, but they can be heard, so please listen. You came too early the first time, too soon, and since time can be very contrary, you had to go back to Upperland, until it was the right time, although time believes it is always right, even if the Oraculum disagrees."

He lifted both her hands in each of his own, and threaded their fingers together, careful of her palms.

"When you returned, you were different, not the same as you were before, but in a good way, a most pleasing way, except for your muchness, and I, well, I…" He faltered, and seemed so very unsure, his lips turned downward, as he thought out his next words, "I began to think of you most differently, since you were not a child. Not that I didn't like you as a child, I most certainly did, but I like you much better now, since you were a grown up you."

He released her hands, and rested his upon his knees, "I thought, perhaps, once you knew Underland was real, and more importantly, that I was real, and not a figment of your imagination, well, you see, it's quite hard to be a clan, if there is only one member, but two, now that would make a fine beginning for a right proper clan, and I think Hightopp is a wonderfully wonderful, and quite noble, clan name. Wouldn't you agree?"

Alice touched his mouth, to quiet him, and asked, "What are you trying to tell me?"

Hatter didn't say a word, instead he drew in a breath, as if trying to gather is muchness, before grabbing her shoulders, pulling her towards him, and kissed her. Alice had been kissed before, chaste kisses upon her lips, innocent and sweet, from a few young men, when her parent hadn't been looking, and she had been kissed by family and friends; but never had she been kissed like this, nor had she ever imagined she would be.

Her first true kiss.

It was deep and passionate, and made her feel things she had never allowed herself to feel. Wicked and wild, and wanting more, even if she didn't know what it was she wanted. She felt hot and cold all at once, her entire body seemed to tingle, and it felt wonderful.

No wonder good young ladies were kept under the constant watchful eyes of parents, maids, chaperones or paid companions. If they knew how incredible a kiss could be, when one found that special someone, well, they would never want it to end.

His hands moved from her shoulders, to cup the back of her head. She felt his fingers move, and twine themselves into her hair. It felt absolutely wonderful.

Unsure what to do with her hands, she first rested them on his partially bared chest, tentatively first, unsure and nervous. She felt his warmth, and the beating of his heart. Feeling bolder, she flattened her beribboned hands, letting herself caress his pale skin. It was glorious. No, it was better than glorious.

Possibly beyond glorious!

Then, as if of their on volition, her hands moved upwards, and pushed his shirt aside, so she could feel the curve of his shoulder, before moving up his neck, and then burying her fingers into his wild orange hair.

The kiss went on, and seemed to whisper promises of things to come, things she didn't understand, but wanted to. Alice was sure those things she wanted to know, were improper, at least between two unmarried people, but she didn't care. This kiss made her want those unknown things.

Neither wished to end it, or let the other go, but both need to breath, and think, because this kissing seemed to befuddle her mind, making reasoning seem very unimportant at the moment.

She touched her lips in wonder; they felt swollen, "Hatter…"

He seemed to be dazed, his eyes wide, and with a blush upon his face; but he had the little half smile upon his lips, that she had come to know and love. Leaning into her, he breathed into her ear, "Ceisd mo chridhe."

She recognized those words from the ones spoken before, "You said that before, but I don't understand what they mean, please tell me."

Hatter's mouth opened, when they were interrupted.

"Silly nit, it means…", but the angry little dormouse was not allowed to finish what she intended to say, because Thackery snatched her up in his paws, and gently pinched her jaws, sealing her little lips together, so all that could be heard was mumbles and grunts. She tried to push at his paw with all her might, giving him a fearsome, vengeful look, which promised retaliation.

"We'll be going now, won't we lassie." Thackery slowly backed out of the room, heading towards a side door, "We'll be giving them some much need privacy, right Mallymkun."

Mally's only response was to arch a brow, and glare, and an obvious shaking of her head, in disagreement. Thackery ignored her response, "I see ye be agreeing with me."

Before he shut the door behind him, he said, "I'll be preparing some tea, should take wee while. Don't be late."

After the door was shut, he must have let Mally go, and although her words were indistinct, they were obviously angry. Whatever she said, must have amused Thackery, because they could hear him laughing.

Alice was embarrassed, having forgotten that they had still been in the room. She covered her face, "Oh dear, what they must think of me." It was one thing to know they saw her in righteous fury, but another to see her acting with such wanton behavior.

A good kiss apparently made one forget there might be an audience.

Chortling, and acting more like the person she knew, he used the tip of a finger to tilt her chin, forcing her to look up, "They'll think us very happy."

"Thackery might, but I'm not quite sure of Mally."

Her dearest Hatter was still laughing at her, "She'll come round, you'll see."

"Maybe." But then Alice remembered, a very important question that had not been answered, "What do those words mean?"

Looking into her eyes, his face became calm and serious. "It means, my heart will always belong to you."

Alice could only gasp, and her stomach did a flip flop. Hatter loved her.

"Why are you still here, Alice? I was sure you would go home, to your small family."

"I fully intended to." Alice gathered her courage. "But a certain gentleman, quite mad he is, has come to mean so very much to me. So much so, that I don't want to leave him, indeed, I've grown rather fond of him; one could say, love him. That is, if he wanted me too."

Hatter, mouth open and eyes wide with disbelief, slowly pointed at himself. He seemed stunned, before understanding came over him and he rose up, giving a loud whoop. For a moment she thought he might burst into a spontaneous performance of futterwacken.

Alice decided that at some future date, she would have him teach her how to futterwacken, although she didn't think she could spin her head , as he did, without it resulting in great injury. But she would have to ask him how he could do it. Unfortunately, there wasn't enough room for him to futterwacken, so he settled for spinning round and round, before pulling her up into his arms, and spun them both round and round, until she was dizzy.

"Truly, really, you'll stay here, with me? In Underland?"

"Yes," she was breathless, "truly and really. But you've made me very, very dizzy"

Setting her down on wobbly feet, she reached beneath her shirt, and pulled out her vial of Jabberwocky blood. Using her thumb, she flipped the lid. Glancing at Hatter, she saw his eyes focus intently on the vial, and every movement of her hand. Tilting the vial, which barely glowed, Alice allowed the content to pour out, until it was empty.

She watched him, as he watch the blood fall. The blood turned to dust and evaporate, before touching the floor.

His vivid green eyes moved back up, to look at her again, "Alice." He then lifted her up, and began to spin her round and round again.

Finally he stopped, and as he held her close, she tried to regain her equilibrium. "What a mad pair we make."

"Do you think so? What a lovely thought that is." As he placed a quick kiss upon her lips. "You're beautiful Alice, and you're mine."

She never considered herself beautiful, just passably fair, and even less than that at the moment. She was filthy and bloodied. Her hair a matted mess, and she was covered in bruises and cuts. She couldn't imagine what she must smell like. But he made her feel beautiful at her worst.

Curling her arms around his neck, she said, "And you are mine."

"Yes, yes, I am yours and you are mine, and no one else shall have either of us. We belong to each other, forever and ever, which is no mere boasting in Underland. Indeed, you could become quite tired of me over time, since we could have forever and ever, not that I'd want you to, you see, for I would not grow bored with you." He seemed to think of something, "But what if you do, become bored that is, and decide that forever is entirely too long; time can seem to be too long sometimes, not that we let time know that, because time is quite prickly about such things, but what if you do…"

Ah, this was her Hatter, and she loved him for it, "Hatter, I doubt that I would ever tire of you, never ever, no matter how much time we have together, or how prickly time can become."

"But what if..", he started to say to her, a bit of doubt creeping into his voice.

Alice decided enough was enough, and knew she had to redirect his thoughts, so she reached up, pulled his face to hers, and stopped his talking with her lips. Although inexperienced and knew to romantic behavior, she considered herself a quick study, and put what she had very recently learned into practice.

It worked, because Hatter stopped talking, and put himself to more pleasant pursuits. He lifted her in his arms and began to walk.

She really didn't pay much attention to where he was taking her, or her surroundings. But, she suspected that Thackery was going to be most unhappy with them, because she knew they would be very, very late for tea.

* * *

**To Be Continued**

* * *

Sorry for the long wait, but this chapter took some time, and much, much reworking. I hope I got it right. This is also a long chapter, compared to the previous ones. On a positive note, I'm almost finish with the next chapter.

This is not the end of the story, since I plan for a few more chapters. Oh, and I think Alice would still call him Hatter, like a pet name, and only call him Tarrant, when she was angry or serious.

Anyway, I bought the blu-ray combo pack of Alice in Wonderland, which I love! My only complaint would be that there were no deleted or extended scenes, which do exist…plus a blooper reel…I love blooper reels! LOL! I heard they will be included in a future, Extra Special Edition of AIW…darn it, they just know I'll buy that one too!

Well, I hope you enjoyed this chapter , and will review. Oh, and use your imagination on why Alice and Hatter would be late for tea…poor Thackery! Hugs to all!


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: Memories And Reflections

Alice sat at her writing desk, with her chin resting in her hand, looking out a window from the personal apartment she had been given in Marmoreal. She allowed the sun to warm her skin, and felt the slight breeze in the air, move her hair. Sighing, she glanced down at the blank sheet of vellum that sat waiting for her to write the perfect words upon it. She then glanced down at her feet, where a the pile of crumpled vellum, that contained the less than perfect words she had managed to write upon them, sat discarded.

If this was to be the last chance she would have to communicate with her family, she wanted the words to be perfect. To let them know she was safe and happy, and not to worry. Not to shed any tears, and to keep alive the hope that, at some time in the future, they would indeed somehow meet, or at least communicate again in some form.

She had been attempting to write the letter for most of the morning, and into the early afternoon, without success. She had thought over and over again, in her head, but couldn't find the words to express what she felt and what she wanted them to know.

Sighing again, she rubbed her throbbing temples, and returned to looking out her window. The view was indeed spectacular to see; mountains, flowers, waterfalls, and songs of birds filling the sweet smelling air.

Although it had been a few weeks, since her return, the memory of that day was still fresh in her mind, and as she suspected, Thackery had indeed been very upset with how late she and Hatter had been for tea.

She could feel her cheeks grow hot, even as she could feel the knowing smile upon her lips.

What they did, well, it was just not done.

At least it wasn't done before proper vows were spoken, and pledges made before many people and a minister. But even then, before vows and pledges can be made, notices would need to be placed, and agreements made between families and a dowry paid.

Alice snorted, at the thought of paying someone to marry her, as if she was a piece of property to be sold by her family.

Well, now that she thought more upon it, maybe it was better how she and Hatter had accomplished it.

The words spoken between them, she held more sacred and dear than any that could be spoken before an audience, after being bought and paid for, then wrapped up in pretty dressings, like a gift to the man lucky enought to afford her.

But what happened between her and Hatter was wonderful, beautiful. Alice grew warmer and shook herself, forcing herself to thoughts of what followed afterwards.

She wasn't sure how long they had spent alone, but much time had passed, when they decided to leave their room, and join Thackery and Mally outside. Once they made themselves presentable.

After dodging flying teacups, and apologizing over and over again, Thackery graciously forgave them, and allowed her and Hatter to joined them at the tables. Being a gentleman, Hatter held out her chair, before taking his. He would not allow her to lift a finger, as he served her tea and pastries.

She could see that he was happy; his eyes so clear and bright, his smile so very wide. She could almost sense a burden had been lifted from his soul, and it warmed her soul to know that she was responsible for it. She knew her face held the same happy expression.

Alice realized, that during the time she had been otherwise occupied with Hatter, the tables had been cleared and cleaned. Apparently March Hares were very industrious, when it came to tea time. Not only were the pastries fresh, but the silverware was polished and the plates and cups new. Not a single chip or crack to be seen. While they had talked of weather, tea and time, they all paused to lift their cups in salute to the end of the Red Queen's reign and the ascension of the White Queen.

A moment of quiet descended upon the small group, when, without warning, Hatter turned to her, and said, as if asking her how her day went, "Will you marry me Alice?"

Alice almost chocked on the tea she had just swallowed, not expecting this question. Oh, she wanted him to ask, knew he would ask, was prepared to say yes, when he did ask; but thinking and knowing it in one's head, and hearing the words you want to hear out loud, were two different things entirely.

Perhaps, because she didn't respond quickly enough, and because Hatter was, well, Hatter, a look of worry came over his face, and with a very slight Scottish accent, "Ye do, don't ye Alice, want to marry me, yes?"

Both Mally and Thackery gasped, and looked at each other, before leaning in to watch the byplay between her and Hatter.

Clearing her throat, she set her cup upon the saucer, and looked him in the eyes. "Marriage is a serious commitment, that should not be taken lightly, or made quickly."

He had a moment of consternation on his face, his lips pulled into a slight frown, before brightening. His accent gone, his voice lighter. "Yes, yes, but you've quite compromised my virtue and, therefore, my reputation. Unless you wish me to be cast out of proper society all together, you must save me from being considered of loose virtue and banished! You've quite debauched me and dragged my name and reputation in the mud!"

While speaking, he rose from his chair, and had crossed his arms. She rose too, hands on her hips, enjoying the moment. "Well, seeing as you have stated how your reputation would be irreparably destroyed, and since I am the one who debauch you, I will sacrifice my freedom to save your honor. It is the only right and honorable thing for me to do. So yes, I will marry you, but only because I must!"

Alice was rather proud that she was able to say it all with a straight and serious face. He sat back down, with a slight smile on his own, hands flat on the table, "Well, then the matter is settled, isn't it."

She sat down as well, and reached out to grasp the hand closest to her. "Yes, it seems we are to be married."

His fingers curled around hers, and gave it a quick squeeze, before leaning over to give her a quick kiss on her cheek. She touched his cheek, and turned his head, so she could kiss his lips. Hatter was most willing to oblige her.

What a wanton woman she had become; she should feel ashamed, but instead felt exhilarated.

Alice could hear Mally make a slight gagging sound at their public display of affection. "Tis alright Mally," Alice heard Thackery say, "There be other fish in sea, or in yer case, mice in the field."

She heard something shatter, followed by the cackling of Thackery, and suspected that the dormouse had thrown one of the teacups at his head. Whether the shattering meant she missed or not, Alice did not know.

As soon she released Hatter, Thackery lifted his teacup, "To the future of the Hightopp clan!"

Even Mally, still looking discontent, raised her cup in salute, but once it was lowered, she jumped upon the table, from her book stacked chair and marched across the table, until she was standing in front of her.

Pulling her hatpin sword from her waist, she pointed it directly at her, "If you ever hurt him, or make him unhappy, I'll gut you!"

"Mally…", Alice did not allow Hatter to finish.

"If I ever do so," She told Mally, "I'll deserve it."

Mally squinted her eyes, and seemed to be thinking, when, with a grunt, she nodded, returned to her seat and her teacup.

Alice realized, although this did not make them fast or close friends, it was a step in the right direction, and it did seem that Mally had finally accepted that she was now a permanent part of Hatter's life, and therefore, hers too.

They returned to their tea, pastries and talk, and at some point, came to the agreement that they should all return to Marmoreal.

A knock at her apartment door, startled her out of her memories. Rising, she smoothed her dress, and patted her hair, before walking to the door. Opening it, she questioned, "Yes?"

Stepping back, to give him room, Tarrant Hightopp, her beloved Hatter, walked in. But before he closed the door behind him, he gave a quick glance up and down the hallway, making sure no one saw him.

Alice stopped him with a hand on his chest, "Hatter, you know the Queen has forbidden us to be along together, before our wedding."

He grinned and lifted a pale finger to his smiling lips.

Since their return, they had not been allowed to be alone together, unless there was a chaperone present. But despite the possible disapproval of the Queen, she was very happy to have him with her, and she allowed him to pull her into his arm. She missed being held by him.

The return to Marmoreal was done at a more leisurely pace, with the bandersnatch taking his time, since there was no urgency. It was much like the first time, with Hatter holding her in his arms, and Mally keeping watch, from atop his hat.

But there were a few differences; Thackery was with them, sitting backwards, and clutching a silver ladle. When she asked him about it, he said it was for protection, because one never knew, when one might need to defend oneself or serve soup. But mostly he used it to fight off the dragon and horseflies that seemed to enjoy irritating him.

The bandersnatch began to make a strange rumbling, growling sounds, that at first concerned her, until it was explained that he was purring. Apparently the bandersnatch could sense their happiness, and was responding to it. Although his purring was unlike any she had heard.

But most importantly, it was how Hatter held her, his fingers slowly caressing her arms, his lips brushing her nape, as he whispered sweet words in her ear. Alice wasn't much better in her own behavior, although, once when Hatter bent too low, and Mally almost fell of his hat, clutching the brim for dear life, and cursing them both, did they decide to behave.

When they did arrive at their destination, the White Queen and Cheshire were waiting, with knowing smiles upon their lips. She wasn't sure how they knew that they would return at that moment, but this was Underland, and all things were possible. After a short conversation, and the Queen looking from her to Hatter and back again, and eyes widening at the realization of how far their relationship had progress, she announced that they would be married as quickly as a proper wedding could be arranged, and that until then, they would keep a respectable distance.

She remembered how she and Hatter blushed, because the Queen knew what they had been up to, which then caused Cheshire to laughed so hard, he accidentally disappear. Since then, the most they could do, under the stern eye of a chaperon, was hold hands.

This was the first time they were able to be alone, and she snuggled into Hatter's arms.

"Well, now, how will she know we are being naughty, unless you tell her, and why would you do that? You would be tattling on yourself, since you're very pleased to see me, and invited me in. It would make no sense to tattle on me, and by default, yourself. Indeed, an unmarried woman, inviting a man into her boudoir, wicked, naughty girl."

She sighed, unable to come up with a response. Really, she didn't want to and clung to him a little longer. Finally breaking apart, she had to ask, "Why are you taking the risk?"

"Well, I've missed you, and wanted to see you without that beady eyed woman starring at us." She saw him shudder most theatrically, "She frightens me, you know."

Pinching his arm, "She's not frightening, just well…", Alice tried to find a word to describe Mrs. Duchess. She wasn't the most pleasant, or attractive of people, and although she wasn't one for smiling and seemed to find constant fault in everything and would run to the Queen about anything; Alice was sure she was only doing what she was commanded to. But to be honest, when she did think of Mrs. Duchess, the first thing that came to mind was…

"Frightening!", he said, quickly moving to the other side of the room, in order to prevent another pinch, and found himself stepping on a crumpled pile of vellum. "What is this?"

"Failed attempts at writing a letter to my family." She walked over and bent down, and began to pick up the many mistakes. "But what is in my head, isn't translating well."

Hatter bent down to help, "Well, I know what your problem is, if you'd like to know."

They were nose to nose, crumpled letters in hand, "Well, are you going to tell me what I'm doing wrong?"

Straightening, he set his handful on the table, Alice then took the hand he held out to her, helping her rise.

Placing her handful next to his, asked ,"Are you?"

Smiling he pulled her close again, and kissed her, and for a moment she allowed herself to forget everything, but then pushed away, and with hands upon her hips, foot tapping, "Well?".

"Ah," he tried to grab her again, but she batted his hands away; his lips turned into a little pout, but his eyes held a twinkle, "You're using your brain, that's the problem."

"I would think using my brain would be a good thing."

Hatter reached out and played with her loose hair, "Using one's brain is helpful in some circumstances, but when it comes to finding what needs to be spoken or written, I believe it is the heart that should be used. The heart knows much more than the brain, in these types of matters."

Alice realized he spoke the truth. She had been trying so hard to think with her brain, that she had not listen to her heart. She touched his cheek, "You're very wise, you do know that, don't you?"

Very pleased with himself, "Yes, I know, but no one else seems to know it, or notice. Well, only you, but you're my Alice, and you know me better than anyone!"

She couldn't resist, and began to laugh, "And you know me better than anyone, because you're my Hatter!"

Impulsively, he took her hands, intending to kiss the palms, when he noticed the faint scars across the palms. A look of sadness came over him, as it always did when he thought of that memory. "Hatter, I swear if you apologize again, I will be quite angry with you. I've already forgiven you, many times over."

Still, he seemed sad, but said, "Time heals all wounds, although how quickly it heals it, is entirely up to time's whim. Time is very whimsical, and contrary, but at least time seems to like you, since it healed your wounds so quickly."

She did not like his sad look, and blew into his ear, which she now knew to be very ticklish, in an attempt to pull him out of it. It worked, because he began to giggle, and still grasping her hands, began to spin her around the floor, dancing to unheard music. Her dress and his coat twirled about them, and the ribbons in his pockets and the bow on his top hat seemed to float about them on the air.

They twirled and twirled about the room, laughing and stealing light kisses.

Alice felt free and wonderful, full of love and dreams. Not the same dreams she had had before, but new ones, that were coming to life, as her new path opened before her. The happiness she saw on Hatter's face was affirmation that she had made the right choice, and although she knew that he would still carry that darkness, and would have his terrible moments of rage and anger, she also knew that she would do her best to lessen those moment, as much as she could.

But no matter what, life was indeed beautiful.

Both of them, so lost in each other, still twirling and kissing, did not hear the knocks on the door, until they became so loud and insistent, they could no longer be ignored.

"I know you're in there Tarrant Hightopp, you cad!", came the shrill voice of Ms. Duchess. "You unhand her now, 'afore I tell the Queen! Tis a shame she won't behead you like her sister!"

The both froze, eyes wide, like children caught misbehaving.

Hatter looked at her, "Oh, dear, she found me. That women is…"

"Frightening?" Alice finished for him.

"Yes, most frightening. I would rather face a Jabberwocky again, instead of her. Oh, I had a thought, perhaps she has Jabberwocky in her, that would explain so much!"

Part of Alice wanted to pinch his ear, and defend Mrs. Duchess' honor, but the other part of her had to agree. She was a dragon, or in the case of Underland, a Jabberwocky of a woman.

More hammering on the door, stronger and more determined, "Hightopp, you get yourself out of Lady Alice's room now!"

He still held her in his arms, "Perhaps, if we are very, very quiet, she will go away.", he whispered in her ear; his orange hair tickled her nose, but she managed to swallow her giggle.

Both remained quiet, staring at the door.

"Don't think I'm fooled," she announced, "I can hear you breathing in there!"

They both looked at each other, and she saw his eyes widened, "Do you really think she can hear me breathing?"

Alice glanced over at the door again, "I have to say, her hearing is most exceptional."

More banging on the door.

With a look of abject defeat, Hatter took a deep breath "I guess I have no other choice but to let her in, and bear the consequences."

She patted his cheek, "You will survive, I'm sure."

She saw his eyes go from the door to her, and back again. He sighed, "But should I not survive…"

Alice kissed his lips, "You will survive, you have to restore my reputation."

"Oh no, my dear, it is my reputation that must be saved. Indeed, it was you, if I recall rightly, that took most fiendish advantage of me!"

The banging at the door continued.

"I disagree, I believe we took advantage of each other, most equally. One could say, most joyfully." Alice smiled, a blush across her cheeks. "I, however, agreed to save your tattered reputation and fell upon the sword of matrimony."

"Joyfully, happily and most satisfyingly, my dearest Alice." He lifted her hands and kissed each palm. Who would ever think her dear Hatter could have such a romantic streak. She quite enjoyed it!

The banging got louder, and it even sounded like she was attempting to throw herself against the door, to burst in on them. "If you two are misbehaving, I swear!"

"I suppose," he said dejectedly, "I must go, before she starts swearing. What if she swore until she was blue?" Hatter shuddered, "It would be disagreeable color on her, given her ruddy complexion."

He gave her a quick kiss, pulled off his hat, and with head hanging, walked to the door said hat held to his chest. He reminded her of a contrite child going to face their parent, after misbehaving. As his hand began to reach for the knob, he glanced back at her, "Remember, think with your heart, not your head. People always forget how wise the heart can be, how truthful and honest."

"I will Hatter, promise." and he smiled at her response, as he opened the door, where a furious and red faced Mrs. Duchess appeared to be preparing to charge the door. Like blue, bright red did not suit her any better.

"There you are, you foolish boy!" She reached up and grabbed his ears, causing Hatter to wince and almost drop his hat. "Well, your both still dressed, so thank heavens for that." She turned to look at Alice, "And you, young Lady, you, you should know better, from a right proper home in Upperworld, not like him, wild and mad that he is! Hightopp's have never been quite right in the head!"

Mrs. Duchess twisted his ear harder, causing him to wince again and this time to yelp, "I should like to keep my ear firmly attached to my head, if you don't mind, and if you can find it in your heart to not twist it off."

"You deserve to have it twisted off!" But she did release his ear, and reaching up, grabbed him by his collar and began to drag him off; to face the White Queen, Alice assumed. She heard Mrs. Duchess berating him, even after the door closed behind them, cutting off her view.

Alice knew how charming Hatter could be, and knew he would face little or no consequences for his actions. The White Queen was too kind, and would know that it would be hard for them to stay apart, until their marriage.

It seemed so far away, and yet happening too fast, that she would soon be Alice Hightopp.

She returned to her writing desk, and pulling a fresh sheet of vellum, dipped her pen into the ink bottle and began to write, and this time, she took heed of Hatter's advice.

She listen to her heart.

* * *

**To Be Continued**

* * *

First off, I'm so very sorry how long this took to post. Real life has a nasty habit of getting in the way! Darn real life! Why can't my fantasy life be real! Why?

It also didn't help, that I wrote this chapter completely, and then decided I didn't like it. So, I deleted it and began again. Sigh.

Anyway, I do hope you enjoy this chapter, and yes, there is at least 3 more chapters. Hopefully I'll have them up quicker than this one.

For those in the know, Mrs. Duchess is of course, based on the Duchess from the original Alice in Wonderland story. She is described as very ugly, mistreats her baby (which turns into a pig), and always trying to stay in the Queens good book. I tried to keep to that; with her mistreating Hatter (and not a poor baby, pig or not!), and ratting him out to the White Queen (not the Red, as in the original).

As always, a big hug and thank you to those that read my story. But since I do like reviews, a tip o' my hat and cup of tea to those that do!

Fairfarren, until the next chapter.


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